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26 March 2013:

Don’t you think gay sex is unnatural and disgusting though?

I was asked this question on my ask.fm, and since I figured this is probably gonna be a very long reply I shall answer it here as another blog post anyway. There are going to be sexual terms described and discussed explicitly, so if you are uncomfortable with it then please stop reading.

Before I mention anything regarding this topic, I suppose some definitions would be necessary. ‘Gay sex’ would refer to anal intercourse between two males.

There are two keywords in the question as well which are essential: ‘unnatural’ and ‘disgusting’. Taken from the Oxford Dictionary, ‘unnatural’ means ‘contrary to the ordinary course of nature, abnormal’; ‘disgusting’ means ‘arousing strong revulsion or strong indignation’. Along the way, there may be the need to introduce other terms, which shall be properly defined as well.

Firstly, I would like to tackle the assertion that gay sex is disgusting. This claim may be easily refuted because the sense of disgusting does not have a solid grounding and definition. Meaning, different people have different thresholds of disgust.

I did a random search on Google as to what people found disgusting. Answers varied, from strawberries to cutting one’s nails in public to oysters. As can be seen, strawberries are not often perceived to be disgusting, but to at least one person, they are. Also, some may regard eating worms and spiders as disgusting. However, history shows that our ancestors, ancient Romans, actually loved to eat insects!

Therefore, I would say that ‘disgusting’ is rather subjective. It is difficult to judge whether gay sex is disgusting. Gays who practise it certainly do not think so, conservatives very much think so, while certain heterosexuals may just accept that it is another form of sexual behaviour. (Some heterosexuals do practise anal intercourse too, for that matter.)

The example regarding ancient Romans do bring me to a side note, though. It shows that what one era of people regards as normal may be what another era of people regards as abnormal. There is evidence that ancient Greeks (amongst other civilisations) practised homosexual anal intercourse for pleasure. That was a societal norm (believe it or not) at that time. Thousands of years later, the behaviour of insect-eating is largely frowned upon. As for gay sex, it's still being debated.

Societal norms will change. The future generations may accept that there are homosexuals that engage in gay sex. However, I am not saying that ‘let’s all be gay and lesbian!’ In the first place, sexual orientation is not by choice. Furthermore, society is, and has been for a very long time, heteronormative. Heterosexual relationships are viewed as the norm.

I believe and wish for this view to continue. After all, LGBTs would still represent a small community as compared to heterosexuals. All that is needed is acceptance and understanding of homosexuals and their sexual behaviour.

It is time to tackle the part on gay sex being unnatural. Gay sex is indeed unnatural. If you were to look at human anatomy, males are born with penises and females with vaginas. Therefore, sexual reproduction would be about vaginal intercourse (and all that stuff they teach in schools). Since gay sex involves two males, it is unnatural in this definition.

In this sense, female masturbation would be regarded as unnatural as well. This is the case for certain religions and conservatives; however, society is more accepting of it now. There are shops blatantly selling dildos and vibrators for females. (Interesting to note, as well, is that the world’s oldest known dildo is 30000 years old. Again, history shows that female self-pleasure is not that modern a concept.)

However, I do not feel that this should be the only criteria people look at when evaluating gay sex. I prefer to look at whether or not it is deviant and unethical. From a sociological point of view, deviant would mean being against societal norms. In Western countries, gay sex is not deviant in nature, since no laws criminalise gay sex in many of those countries.

In Asian countries, certain countries would probably regard gay sex as deviant. Going by the legal viewpoint, Singapore is probably one of them, since Section 377A of the Penal Code still has not been repealed.

More importantly, though, is that gay sex is not unethical. With regard to ethics, I prefer to focus on human rights and morals. A commonly used argument against gays or gay sex is that ‘If you can accept two males having sex, then you might as well accept paedophilia or bestiality.’ (Paedophilia is the act of having sex with an underage child; bestiality is the act of having sex with an animal.)

However, gay sex differs widely from these two deviant acts. Gay sex is between two consenting males. (If it’s homosexual rape then yes, it’s wrong too.) Bestiality and paedophilia are not between consenting adults. This difference is important, because adult humans are able to think and consider before giving consent.

And as part of  human rights, there should be the freedom of choice. If a man is gay and he chooses to engage in gay sex, then so be it. It does not infringe on any morals and both parties are responsible for their actions. In contrast, paedophiles often take advantage of the innocence of children to trick them into having sex. Bestiality also takes advantage of animals’ desires; when animals are high on hormones, they sometimes do not mind mating with something not of its species.

Thus, I may say that yes, if the biological definition is to be strictly followed, gay sex is unnatural. But as illustrated above, my belief is that the act is all right so long as it is not deviant and unethical.

In conclusion, I would like to quote what former Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew said: ‘…leave people to live their own lives so long as they don't impinge on other people’. We should all accept that there is such behaviour happening in society. However, there is no need to actively condemn such acts. Unless gay sex is being done in public, then it is of a different matter and yes, that is severe public nuisance and needs to be stopped. If not, just live and let live; some prefer men, some prefer women. Sex is a basic human need according to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, and it is inevitable that homosexuals need to have this need fulfilled too.


17 March 2013:

Here we go again.

The last time I blogged was 5 March, which is 12 days ago. At that time, I was feeling downcast. There were judgemental voices and opinions against me. Not to say there aren't anymore, but it certainly got lesser and I'm much better now.

Except that now the stress and workload is the problem. Firstly, I have seven free periods. Excluding Mondays and Wednesdays where most people go back late, these seven periods mean that I go back 1.5 hours later on average.

Actually regarding free periods, there are two sides to it. Some people rather have free periods where they can catch up on sleep or finish overdue homework. Others, like me, rather go home earlier and catch up on sleep or finish overdue homework. So it really depends.

Secondly, the only early day for me is the one that I have CCA on. Every Thursday I'm dismissed at 1230. Actually it's 1320 but I don't take H1 CL so it's one less period. My CCA starts at 1640. So from 1230 to 1640, I have to do things within that time, else it gets wasted.

Based on the past weeks' experience, it does get wasted. Not totally, but most of the time goes to sleeping and stoning. I am too exhausted to actually focus and complete tutorials. Otherwise, I end up talking to friends who accompany me in doing work. (Okay this one I'm to blame.)

~

I went back to CCHMS on Friday. It wasn't an official home-coming day, but VJ and MJ had given their students a full day off, so many went back. TJ gave half-day on Monday. On Friday my lessons ended at 1550, and cos it was a practical, I actually ended around 1600 cos I was washing up.

(Side note 1: There are so many things to do in bio practical. I really fear that I'm unable to complete them in time for the actual SPA which is this year.)

(Side note 2: It is actually nicer for people who have completed washing up to go around helping others, instead of wisecracking.  When people are hurrying and there you are saying supposedly funny statements, it's not appreciated.)

I reached CCHMS at 5. The first thing I did was to go visit Wushu. It's been a long time since I went back. 教練s were shocked to see me. As usual, CCHMS Wushu is good. I can tell the difference between their Wushu and TJ's Wushu.

However the team still doesn't have a sense of urgency. As usual people just take their own sweet time to do things. It actually isn't that serious now but all the little bits of time compounded will add up to a 'big waste'. Competition is coming up for them in April. All the best for them and I hope they can better the record set by us last year.

~

If anything, I may have to drop to H1 History. It's not that I don't like SEA history. However, because I didn't take it in secondary school, I am a little lost over what to do. At least for international history, I do have experience from O Levels. I am able to relate to concepts and phrases used.

In SEA history though I am clueless about things. I know it's roughly about colonialism leading to nationalism leading to independence, but there are many more details to remember.

So yes, if need be, I have to drop down to H1 history. Actually H1 history is a bit like O Levels SS, because there is the 'unrelated' part on Arab-Israeli conflict, just like the Iraq-Kuwait thingy.

KL seems fine with H2 history so far, he's obviously cleverer than me to be able to get it. Or maybe I just need to read more. Frankly speaking I haven't been reading much on H2 history since lessons began, only reading them for the first time when lectures start. For history it's a big no-no, so I plan to read them during the holidays.

~

Speaking of the holidays, what holidays? Well yes we get a week's break but in actual fact students from upper secondary and older will understand that there's no such thing as March or September holidays. They will be burnt on studying and studying.

On an unrelated note, I think my maths tutor is very unhappy with me. I have handed in homework late and I didn't even hand in my worksheet which I defaulted on twice. So yes, I have to finish EVERYTHING during this holidays. I shall start Term 2 on a good note.

Term 2 is when Twelfth Night will play. I got a role in this production, and I must say I'm quite happy that I got a role on my first try. Others who got it were either from IP or had prior drama experience in secondary school. There was only one other guy who is an international scholar but yes he was certainly much better than me.

~

So far I'm contented with many things. My class is fine and my CCA is good too. However this doesn't guarantee that things will remain as such. I'm still constantly worried that conflicts may appear in either class or CCA.

I mean, I definitely can hang out with others (such as those from my OG or from CCHMS) but after a while it'll be imposing on them. They too will have their new friends and/or cliques. If I still stick with them it'll show how socially inept I am.

My class has five guys vs 19 girls. This gender imbalance is common in BCM* classes. Apparently lesser guys take bio, I really don't know why. It's either they got forced by parents to take the standard PCME route, or they somehow still think that physics is the more useful science.

~

I've started cycling recently, having learnt it last December. ECP has too many inconsiderate people around, that sucks. Maybe next time I should go at obscure timings so that I can siam the crowd.

TTFN.


5 March 2013:

How would you like it if I called you names?

To start of, today wasn't a good day. From the start, I was already very gloomy and moody. In the morning I came to school with a black face, which some of my classmates certainly saw. Thanks for showing concern being kaypoh about it.

With that grumpiness not yet subsiding, I met with a minor incident. That I shall not talk about because it was my fault too.

While I was having my free period, I heard someone say 'I found another gay'. Seconds later, someone I know approached me.

I know they were talking about me. I know that as usual, I am being laughed at, being judged. I don't understand why some cunts like to do such things. Judge people they don't know.

You may say I am not manly. Definitely. But is that a reason to laugh at others? This is a rotten societal misconception that says guys should be manly. Once some guy doesn't behave that way, he is judged and criticised or even laughed at.

In drama there are some guys who are like me. I guess we are more expressive. Yet no one laughs at us there. It's simply because, thankfully, people there are less judgemental and more accepting of the 'abnormal' types of people.

Whereas outside of that, there are absolute bigots and pricks who can't stop judging. They have a fixed view of how people should behave.

Gender and sexuality is a very complex and diverse issue. Certain effeminate guys turn out to be heterosexual and have loving wife and children. Certain manly guys are actually homosexual. Given the dynamism, why judge and laugh at people? It's simply uncalled for.

And by the way, so what if I behave like that? Does it cause distress? If not, why should you care! If there's nothing better to say just shut that buccal cavity of yours.

TTFN.


2 March 2013:

最近還好嗎?

I have neglected this blog for around 30 days now. Frankly speaking I don't have much passion to blog now. School has started. I must say I'm contented and happy that I got into the JC of my choice, first choice.

~

Orientation started on 1st Feb. Today is 2nd Mar. This means 30 days. I've been into the college for 30 days. And already, I'm being judged. People are already calling me 'weird' and etc. I don't know if there are other nastier comments.

The thing about my college (as heard from a reliable enough source) is that rumours spread below ground. Meaning, you won't even know you are the target of rumours. Until, until you get whacked badly by it and things explode before your eyes. So I really don't know what some have been saying of me.

It is quite a shock to hear that people are judging me. I really always think that I wasn't very popular and attention-attracting. True I ran for (and dropped out of) House Comm, but then again how many would know me through that? Campaign hasn't exactly started and my poster is not up anywhere in the school.

So yes, I'm surprised that people are judging. Or rather, I'm surprised that people can judge. Do they have any basis for what they say? I am slightly hurt by what I heard. But of course, I am cleverer and stronger than that. I shall not be upset by those remarks for long.

I wonder what else may come out from people's mouths. I await to see how crude / judgemental people can get. I shall start on homework tomorrow.

TTFN.



aboutme.

From Singapore. 20 years of age. Blogs as and when inspiration comes, in British English (and Singlish), Traditional Chinese and (hopefully) Russian. Not a lifestyle blogger, expect posts to be serious, dull or even obscure. I enjoy comedy, in particular British humour.



interests.

[more or less in order] medicine | forensics | theatre | modern world history | typography (including style and grammar) | visual design | Taiji | Chinese language and literature | Mandarin pop (and singing) | Apple products.



typography.

PT Serif for main text and links. Ubuntu Condensed for dates, post titles and sidebar headings. Both fonts from Google Web Fonts.



credits.

singzeon. by Sing Zeon is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International Licence. Pictures used here either come from my Instagram (instagram.com/singzeon) or Google image search. For the latter, I do not own those pictures.



quote.

Hard to love. 認真你就輸了。