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30 April 2011:

#16: I am a rather persistent person. I won't give up easily if I don't know what I want to know.


28 April 2011:

Today, the first paper was settled.

On a completely unrelated note,

#15: As a child, I never got to play in the playground in my private apartment. I was confined to my house for 6 years. When I finally sneaked out (with my maid who pitied me so much) and dashed to the playground, I stepped onto a freshly produced piece of dog excrement.


27 April 2011:

People, power, politics.

I love working with people. Well, most people, people who do not always start conflicts with others and be very indignant about it.

I treasure power. I never had a real feel of power, but I hope I don't abuse it when I have a taste of it. Power can be very useful, especially in the case of Stalin and Hitler.

I enjoy politics. That would showcase me as a very scheming person, but well, maybe a bit. But I like watching how players are manipulated by one single leader, while each of them strives for their own power.



#14: I dare say, I am effectively bilingual. Talk to me in either English or Chinese, and I can converse with you fluently. Heh, maybe even dialect works ...


26 April 2011:

I think I am going to do very badly for this exam.

Let me show you what I mean:

English: nothing much to say, my English has always been mediocre. My attempts to improve my vocabulary has not been very successful, due to a lack of interest. I handed in my CA1 Component 5 today, frankly speaking, I'd be happy if I can get a B4, which would translate to around 18/30.

華文:雖然我每次都能得到頗好的成績,不過我還是擔心這次的考試。不是我杞人憂天哦,是因為這次有作文、實用文。我的寫作一向都把我的總分給拉下來,所以我挺擔心的。而且,我最怕的是自己不過時間完成試卷一(寫作)。那麼,我的試卷二也會受到影響。不是開玩笑的,

E Math: let's just say that I don't bother paying attention to the teacher in class. No, I am not so good in class till I don't need to, but it's because the lesson has been so boring and mundane that even I don't feel like listening. Besides that, the teaching method is definitely not working for my class. My E Math test was returned today: I scored less than 70%. To make things worse, a teacher added that this test was supposed to be a "motivational booster", i.e. a lot of people were supposed to score very well, to boost their spirits before the exams. Apparently it has done the reverse to me. I guess I have to do more E Math questions over the weekend. Oh, guess what: the TYS for E Math just arrived today, approximately 1 week away from the exams.

A Math: this is probably the most confident subject of mine in the whole of MYE this time, since there is the assurance that if I stop making careless mistakes and revise the techniques well enough, there is a high chance of me getting >95%. Maybe it's because I have tuition ... but I'm sure it's also because I have a wonderful teacher that can teach in a very systematic and logical way; definitely the best way to teach A Math.

Bio: this subject is one of the most worrying one. As I was telling S just now, previously I at least had an idea of the syllabus. Now, I am totally confused and mixed up. It also doesn't help that Nutrition in Plants must be covered, since I absolutely detest anything related to do with plants. I know that it has to be learnt, since Biology would mean that it's everything about life, and life is also consists of plants, and blah ... Well, I still don't have any interest whatsoever. I guess one reason would be that I am unable to relate to plant systems (you can understand digestion because it is happening as you learn, for example).

Chem: this subject is also a very worrying one. The pressure (from myself subconsciously) is very high since I scored quite well for last year's EYE. But, for last year, I was relatively well-prepared, unlike this year's MYE! I also realised that my KPT is rather weak; I really need to do something about it. Also, the chapter on Chemical Structure and Bonding, although some was covered in Sec 2, I still feel a little lost. Especially with new things like giant molecular structure ... I catch no balls, man.

Physics: although throughout the tests, I did quite okay, but I'm really afraid that during the MYE, I'll just freak out and not be able to answer a lot of questions. My concept is more or less there, but I might miss out on something, and that might cost me a lot of marks. By the way, I still don't understand the concept of free fall and the relation to air resistance. Someone knock some sense into me.

Social Studies: I'll wait till tomorrow's SS lesson to find out how well / how disastrous my test went. I hope that at least if my SS is okay, it will pull up the grade of History. However, it has been a trend for almost every batch of students that SS (or rather Combined Humanities) is never passable, or at least never able to get an A. Can I be part of the batch that breaks this trend ...?

History: enough has been said. Refer to previous post(s) for information on how screwed I am.

That's all for now. I'm screwed. Thank you for your concern.


25 April 2011:

A few things today.

As with the previous post, I was very angry with a councillor L. Of course, I shan't disclose his name here, but he really got my goat. I've already feedbacked to someone, so I seriously hope that something can be done. I don't expect him to get kicked out or anything like that, since he does have his merits, but in the situation he is in now, I seriously don't like it.

Really hope something can be done soon.

I was really angry today. Well, I won't really get angry if it's only one matter, but just now was a mixture of many things, including the matter of L. Then, also, was the fact that 3IT + 3RP History students are gonna die badly. Okay, maybe not 3RP students, since they are all muggers. So 3IT history students are gonna die badly.

Mr. Y, our History teacher was absent today. I'm not angry that he was absent, since he was probably sick or something, but at least give an SMS to tell us? Like that, we would know what to do / read up on. We are already lagging much in our syllabus. Our class has not started on Hitler's rise to power and the militarists' rise to power, when they are quite important.

The worse thing is that, the part about the militarists could be allocated to SEQ, since on the syllabus guide, it says that only Stalin and Hitler will be used for the SBQ. All the more, Mr. Y should have gone through militarists!

ZH and I were discussing this during History just now, and he was saying that since militarists totally wasn't covered at all (there was at least a worksheet on Hitler), hopefully this was actually a hint to us that it would not be tested. I sincerely hope that is very true. If not, we will die.

My History isn't very good to being with. Now, with the content lacking, how am I going to excel using my mediocre skills? At least if my skills are very good, I can 撐起 the paper ... Now, when both are not good at all, what am I supposed to do?!

That brings me to another thing. The MYEs are starting in 3 days. I am totally not prepared. Or should I say, I am even less prepared than last year. Already, last year I received "滿江紅". I really fear about my results this year. I wanna get into VJC to take MCBH. Then, I shall go to NUS and take MBBS, followed by specialisation in Forensic Pathology.

Hah, I've planned out everything. But will my life really follow this road? I don't know. Let time tell ...


22 April 2011:

I had a very weird dream last night.

Normally, I won't be able to remember my dreams when I wake up. Or at least, I won't be able to remember the full version of the dream. However last night's dream still stayed in my head. It was a rather weird one; not the kind of dream that you would expect.

I was at the doctor's. Some tests were done, and the doctor had to remove my spine for checking! The procedure wasn't pain at all, but I had do be very still while the doctor was doing it. There was no operation; the doctor just took a suction pump and sucked my spine out. I could feel that my back had become softer.

So then the doctor told me that he had finished, and that he would replace my spine in me when it was ready. He also warned me that I had to be very careful not to move my body anyhow, since there was no spine now. For the rest of my dream, I spent my time lying back facing up, constantly feeling very soft.

For the context, I can roughly understand why my dream was such a weird one. For those who know, I recently dislocated my knee. So perhaps that was why my dream was at the doctor's, since I went there to have my knee "fixed back". But why my spine? Was it a sign that I was spineless?

And what did it mean when I was lying on my back the whole time? Could it mean that I was unable to do take action against something? This dream has been very philosophical. I really hope I can get an answer soon.

#13: For preferences on fruits, I like Fuji Apple from China a lot. Although they have been flamed for containing wax, preservatives, artifical substances, man-made sugar, but it's still nice. (No wonder it's being sold so cheap; the apple is so artifical.)


21 April 2011:

#12: I have a mild phobia of escalators. I don't when it started, but now I am unable to get on an escalator without at least slowing down. Contrary to how phobias are developed, I had never had any accidents involving escalators. So until now, I am really puzzled about the phobia. By the way, it's called escalaphobia, but the name isn't an official designation.


18 April 2011:

今天蠻生氣的。

其實,我不知道自己需不需要如此生氣。可能,我真的是太「敏感」了。不知道,我道來,你決罷。

L是一名學長。他在班上罵粗話、用手機、玩球、打架……

本來,我不是執行人士,所以可以照樣置之不理。但是,這會給其他學生怎樣的印象?「L能這麼做,爲什麽我不能?」

還有啊L,給你說一聲,我在提醒你過後,如果你不想順從,請不要敷衍。我寧可你根本不管,也不要因為想假裝聽我的話而起初答應,並且很虛偽地説「不要玩了」,然後又在玩。

就這樣。


17 April 2011:

就是這樣結束了。

這是相當大的一個錯誤。也不能完全說「我不該犯這個錯誤」,但我不該讓這錯誤越來越嚴重。紅燈已經亮了好久;我置之不理,選擇逃避。結果很明顯,不歡而散。

我好想說「我可以解釋」。但那是不負責任的,錯后才慌忙補救情況。而且,我的解釋也不是很好,恐怕只會給她帶來給多的傷害。

在學校里,我們該怎麼面對呢?是微笑著點點頭?還是帶著氣憤地凝視彼此,然後擦肩而過?

說真的,我是打算做回朋友的。我可沒想到要這麼「撕破臉」。朋友還是可以做吧——以前也許如此。現在你這麼的受傷,我還有臉説「做回朋友」嗎?我這麼做,可能帶來更多的不滿。

那麼,就這樣「默默離開」嗎?明天以後,我們還有很多見面的機會。不用特地,也都會有的。怎麼辦?當中的尷尬肯定很多;回憶也會很多。

其他人散,有些彼此帶著仇恨;我們應該沒有到那部田地吧。可我們也沒有很和諧的散,就中間地散。

我也不懂得該怎麼表達。當初愛的轟轟烈烈。

以上這句是我聽來的。其實還有個下半句,但我始終不知道。也許我沒資格知道。

我不傷心,真的。 但這不代表我鐵石心腸,我有感到虧欠,後悔。事情不該是這樣的。It just spiralled out of control. 我真的不該想了。

#11: I am such a jerk.


15 April 2011:

This week has been an eventful week.

So many things have happened. I don't know where I should begin with.

The Wushu competition has ended, after two weeks or so. This year was my second year attending the competition. I don't know why, but I suddenly became so nervous before my turn. Before that, I totally wasn't nervous at all. So, I still don't know why my body suddenly decided to pump some unnecessary adrenalin into my body. Anyway, so that's about my event.

By the way, you can stop asking about my score / position / "how did you do". It's a personal habit of mine, but I don't like to reveal it, regardless of whether I won or not. So it's also not because I lost, so I don't have the guts to tell it. Well, if you want, there actually are some ways to find out my result. So go on if you want.

The group event yesterday was very exciting, with many "thrills and spills". There was this school that used 九節鞭 (whip) as their group weapon. At first, I was really bored, so I didn't know exactly what that was (the whip was kept and "hidden" in their hands); so I was just staring at whatever it could be. Then all of a sudden, 8 whips fly out of 8 hands at the same time. The crowd went crazy. That effect really went well, although in the end they didn't really get a very good score.

Then the same school used 三節棍 (three-section cudgel) for their B Division Boys. That really was bad. They were hitting the floor with their weapon for most of the time (as in, this was part of their routine), but there sure wasn't going well with the judges. In the end, they had the lowest score for that event. Maybe next year, their coach would change their weapons to something more common.

Next up, a lament on my studies. Because of the Wushu competition, so I have been missing lessons. At first it seemed okay, then suddenly I discover that for a few subjects, the remaining content is a lot, and I have to cover them alone. I also missed a few test in the process; luckily they are more or less settled by now. I still have a Chinese test on Monday morning. I striked a bet with HX that for every 1 mark difference, the loser has to pay the winner $0.50. So if HX wins me by 8 marks, I have to pay her $4! Which also means, I definitely need to do my very best for this test.

And my History hasn't been coping well. It also doesn't help that my History teacher started on a new chapter on Stalin during the lesson that I was away. This means another subject for me to "teach myself". For content, I think it's still okay. But for skills, I'm doomed if I missed it as well. I think I should start looking out for consulation sessions.

I've been quite sleepy this few days. I think it's also because of the Wushu competition. (Ms C, if you're reading this, I'm actually fine! :D) By next week, I should be back to my original state. I sure hope it's not too late to start preparing for the MYE.

#10: I seriously don't think that being on television is an especially glamorous thing to do. It is something to be proud of, but I don't understand why some people will go crazy when they know their friend went on TV. Are you "sharing the joy"? Or just finding a way to be partially in the limelight so that you can boast to more people that "my friend went on TV"? (Does this even count as #100factsaboutme? LOL.)


9 April 2011:

Today was the last time my coach would coach us.

Before the competiton, our school got two temporary coaches. One taught 南家, another taught 太極. Today, this would be the last time. It was a bit abrupt. Her duty was to teach us 太極, and she did it. Yet, it feels very sudden to just leave like that.

Coach said she would be coming to watch us on Monday. I hope that doesn't make me nervous again. I seriously hate the adrenalin (or whatever) that's pumping through my body when I don't need it! Let's hope Monday wouldn't be like that again.

#10: I am quite okay with a lot of foodstuffs, so long as it's not too spicy. Oh, but I like Lor Mee, Chicken Rice, and Nasi Lemak a lot.


:

#9: I go vegetarian on the 1st and the 15th of the lunar month.


8 April 2011:

Wushu is a team sport.

Yesterday, I asked on Formspring about what to blog about. Yeah, I was a little short of ideas. One of the answers was about SYF practices. Since Wushu doesn't have SYF, but it has a competition, I shall blog about it!

It's been four days since the competition started on the 5th of April. Today was another "Taiji day"; it was Taiji events on one court for a while. (What I don't understand was why the Taiji events cannot be held throughout the whole of today; then there is no need for Monday's "Taiji day" again.) Anyway, there is good news to day again. LN became the first double gold medallist, getting gold for both Taiji Quan and Taiji Jian.

To the rest of the Taiji people, never mind, you have tried your best, so winning does not matter. Me and R will be competing on Monday for 42 Taiji Quan, so let's see how we perform then. Note to self: I should not be so nervous again.

Oh, another thing. People have been asking me about my results. Well, sorry, but my "style" is that I don't like to disclose anything about my competition. And I don't do that only when I lost, so please, I am not a sore loser that does not admit losing. One behaviour of Ri really irked me. He went to my venue and took a video of me. Then he threatened to post it on Facebook.

Like, how irritating can you get, Ri? I already did not say much about you being there, since I can't really stop you, although I did mention that I don't like people watching, cos that'll make me more nervous. Then, you take a video. -.- Oh, and you showed it to people from my class.

Much as I don't like audiences, I'd rather having people watching it "live", than watching it from someone's phone or video camera. I don't why, but I really don't like it. Maybe you could say it's a pet peeve of mine ...

This year, our school has not been performing well. I'm not gonna point fingers at anyone, since it's a team effort, but we should all buck up. I'll buck up too, yeah. Let's hope to get our school in the top 3 places at least! I know one division surely has no problem with that, cos a few people received placings today.

I'm ending my post with a comment made by the ridiculous authoritarian, again.
Maybe you should not get gold. This way, your coach would have doubts about you, so next year you won't need to compete. Then you can spend more time on your studies.

Hmm, I wonder what values I can pick up from there? Selflessness?


7 April 2011:

Another short post today.

I have submitted my blog to Technorati. So as part of their checking process, I am supposed to post this claim token here: C56XMXZBAQMN. Hello, Technorati? Yep, it's here now. Sorry about the delay then.


5 April 2011:

Ooh, scandal.

This blog post (hover) has some interesting stuff. Maybe people should take a look at this long but interesting post, and spread it around.

***

Competition is tomorrow, good luck to all Taiji people! :)

#8: I have a very high threshold of gory images. Many a time, I would view decapitated bodies without any emotion, while others around me at that time would already be complaning in disgust. I still remember this one time where CW acted pro by insisting that he was okay with the images. I found something worse, and he conceeded. 拿得起,放得下。


3 April 2011:

First event is in two days time.

太極劍 is on 6 Apr, and 太極拳 is on 11 Apr. It's a little funny that 太極劍 is before 太極拳 this time.

On FB, a few people from Wushu are posting statuses about getting sick. ): Get well soon (real soon since competition is round the corner) to those of you who are sick, and to those who aren't, don't get sick. Duh right, but actually it's easy to forget about it.

My throat is a little sore now. I really hope that sickening sore throat doesn't come back again. I know that I haven't been watching what I ate (see what I meant), but I don't remember eating any heaty foods. All the things that I ate were all quite "normal".

Anyway, if the sore throat really were to come back, I shall arm myself with Strepsils again.

This post is trunctated cos I want to watch the political forum on Ch8. Sorry.

#7: I really want to be a forensic pathologist.


2 April 2011:

好像有幾天沒寫文章了horh。

前幾天,還有繼續 #100factsaboutme。但是,沒有真正寫別的東西。現在,終於想寫東西了。其實,前幾天,也沒有很忙,不過就是太懶了。好吧,來回顧一下前幾天發生的事情。

昨天我就 tweet 了東西。真的,duty 做完了,疲倦隨之而來。不知道為何會這樣;挺神奇的。是身體不再供應腎上腺素了嗎?可能真的如此,做 duty 的時候,身體不停地產生腎上腺素,所以來「支撐」我的身體。

昨天在做 duty 的時候發生一些些的事情,導致一些情緒上的不滿。情緒的波動是難免的,不過有些時候,自己還是要敏感些,確保自己沒有在無意中傷了別人的心。

當然,我知道自己肯定也有如此過,所以現在也努力地在時刻約束自己的行為。希望以後不會再犯這個嚴重得錯誤吧。

不過,昨天的 duty 大致上還是很順利的,所以自己也挺有滿足感。當然,從課堂、到ISH、到Audi 來回奔波,是有點累人的。可是我撐得住!

下個禮拜一有中四的家長會。如果我還被分配到工作做,我覺得自己應該會要找人代替我吧。幹了兩場,也算有付出够了吧。

最後留下一句:戰爭是和平。自由是約束。無知是力量。

#6: I am more of a Science guy (as compared to humanities), but I like History a lot. Where you learn of the past.



aboutme.

From Singapore. 20 years of age. Blogs as and when inspiration comes, in British English (and Singlish), Traditional Chinese and (hopefully) Russian. Not a lifestyle blogger, expect posts to be serious, dull or even obscure. I enjoy comedy, in particular British humour.



interests.

[more or less in order] medicine | forensics | theatre | modern world history | typography (including style and grammar) | visual design | Taiji | Chinese language and literature | Mandarin pop (and singing) | Apple products.



typography.

PT Serif for main text and links. Ubuntu Condensed for dates, post titles and sidebar headings. Both fonts from Google Web Fonts.



credits.

singzeon. by Sing Zeon is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International Licence. Pictures used here either come from my Instagram (instagram.com/singzeon) or Google image search. For the latter, I do not own those pictures.



quote.

Hard to love. 認真你就輸了。